Saturday, December 14, 2013

Who Won?

Last Sunday I announced a giveaway/contest. Frank Carey over at offered his wonderful new product as a giveaway. The Lifter is an accessory for the DeWalt DW788 or the Delta 40-690 scroll saws. It's actually more than an accessory to me it's an essential add-on.

Tonight I will announce the winner. The contest was simple. You had to follow a couple rules and send me your funniest family friendly joke. Tonight I randomly drew five finalist. I handed the list to my wife. Her job was to pick the best joke from the five finalist.

Let me say one thing before I announce the winner. There were well over 100 entries. I'll have to admit that I have not been able to read them all yet but I have read several. I feel comfortable in making a clinical analysis of the results. As a community we need to get out of our workshops more!

My funny scale ranges between Carrot Top as a ZERO and Bill Cosby(The early days) as a 10.
As a community I rate us as a Charlie Sheen.

First, here are the five finalist and their jokes in no order. :)

Michael Cherry - Arizona

What do you call a short, sunburned, thief on a horse?
Little red riding hood.
Matthew Compton - Ontario, Canada.

I asked my five year old son, "Where would you find a tree?"
He replied, 'That is easy dad!  Between the 2 and the 4.'
 Nancy Schanda - Missouri

What do a chicken and a car have in common?
Chevrolet (pronounced:  She Ever Lay)
Matt Miller - Arizona

Two inexperienced hunters went hunting in the woods. Before long they got lost. “Don’t worry,” said the first hunter, “I heard that when you’re lost you should fire three shots in the air that someone should hear you.” They fired three shots in the air and waited a half hour. They tried again another three and nothing happened. Finally they decided they will try it once more. “This better work,” said the second hunter nervously. “These are our last arrows!”
Robin Schmeder - Washington

Chicken Surprise

A couple go for a meal at a Chinese restaurant and order the 'Chicken Surprise'. The waiter brings the meal, served in a lidded cast iron pot.
Just as the wife is about to serve herself, the lid of the pot rises slightly and she briefly sees two beady little eyes looking around before the lid slams back down.
'Good grief, did you see that?' she asks her husband. He hasn't, so she asks him to look in the pot. He reaches for it and again the lid rises, and he sees two little eyes looking around before it slams down.
Rather perturbed, he calls the waiter over, explains what is happening, and demands an explanation.
'Please sir,' says the waiter, 'what you order?'
The husband replies, 'Chicken Surprise.'
'Ah! So sorry,' says the waiter, 'I bring you Peeking Duck!'
Okay now for the winner as selected by my wife.

Drum Beat.............

Chicken Surprise by Robin Schmeder. Congrats Robin. I will be sending you an email soon. We will need your complete shipping address. We will get the Lifter out to you as soon as we hear back. Thanks to everyone who took the time to send your joke. Thanks to Frank Carey for making the Lifter available for the contest.

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